Posted on: Saturday, October 16th, 2004 by Cheryl Felicia Rhoads
Outside View: '60s sitcoms and '04 debates
By Cheryl Felicia Rhoads
Outside View Commentator
Hollywood, CA, Oct. 13 (UPI) -- I was one of those rare folks who actually thought President Bush won the first debate. The substance over style was obvious. However, in the days that followed, with friends and family alike, I felt like Laura Petrie arguing with Millie Helper on the Dick Van Dyke show.
Let me explain:
One of its all time great episodes, in my opinion, is called "No Rice At My Wedding," a flashback show used to enrich the back story of the main characters. In it Dick Van Dyke's Rob Petrie met Laura, played by Mary Tyler Moore, while he was a draftee and she was with the U.S.O.
Laura had committed to be the prize in a win-a-date raffle on the army base. Rob was not happy about it, but was somewhat comforted by the fact that is would be just one date to raise money for the troops.
The soldier who wins, however, is the extremely handsome and dashing Clark Rice -- played by dreamboat actor Van Williams. Rob Petrie now faced the prospect of losing his Laura for good. Naturally there is a point where our heroine is torn as to whether to stick with her old boyfriend, our hero ... or explore a new relationship with his smooth-talking competitor.
I was very affected by this poignant little love triangle tale. Even as a kid I got the clear message that substance must trump style.
Nowhere is the latter point driven home more clearly than where Laura's best friend, Millie decides to develop a point system Laura can use to make her decision.
Millie is the typical sitcom best friend: very opinionated and is always advising on matters in which she has no personal experience. She authoritatively compares each guy's husband material potential, awarding points for who should win Laura's hand -- but points for those things that only reflect her own shallow preferences.
She gives the challenger 10 points for being very handsome and good 'ole reliable Rob 5 points for being cute. A litany follows of other criteria, 10 points for being debonair and Van Dyke's character get 5 points for being funny in goofy way, etc.
At one point Laura protests the assessments, pointing out that Millie is heavily tilting her system to favor the challenger. And -- as if she is totally impartial -- Millie defensively retorts with a straight face. "Look Laura, it's not me ... it's the point system!
Perhaps by now you see the analogy to the debates and the election; perhaps not, so let me explain further: The political pundits and Democratic spinners are one big Millie. They pontificate as they dissect debating criteria that they have decided are the key ingredients in what will make the best husband ... er ... president.
John Kerry may be a slick suitor and he's got the most medals for the shortest stint in the service. But his claim he would be a strong leader in time of war is not backed up by his 20-year record in the Senate.
He voted against the 1991 Gulf War even when the United States had global support. As Vice President Dick Cheney pointed out, Kerry was only for the current war with Iraq when it was popular; when the anti-war Howard Dean surged in the polls, Kerry and John Edwards jumped on the anti-war bandwagon.
The handsome Edwards blends with Kerry's uniform. Together they are "Clark Rice" who tried to steal Mary Tyler Moore from Dick Van Dyke!
Eventually, Laura chose Rob -- even though he was flawed by Millie's suspect standards. Rob may stumble over the ottoman as he enters the house ... but always picks himself up with the help of his family and friends. May the United States be as wise about its choice for president as Laura Petrie was in her choice of a husband. Sure, we may occasionally cry "OOOOHHH, ROBBBBBB," but never the less, George W. Bush, is a solid choice for the long term.
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(Cheryl Felicia Rhoads is a writer and actress living in Hollywood, Calif.)
Articles by Cheryl Felicia Rhoads
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